Most Neglected Activity in our Lives - Self-Care.

Today would like to dedicate this blog to something we always ignore. "Self-Care"

What is this self-care?

Self-care is nothing but taking care of yourselves and having some alone time in which you do something you are passionate about, your hobbies, or anything that doesn't seem like a chore to you.

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In life, from the day we are students, we do as our parents say; after we graduate from college, we do as our boss says and at home, we do as our husband/wife says, and in the meantime, we tend to forget what makes us happy and what is our purpose in life. At each stage of our life, we have made so many compromises that, ultimately, we are unsure if those would even matter.

While working in the intensive care unit of a hospital, I came across a 70-year-old woman in a very critical condition. Her relatives were all visiting her. One fine night, she called and asked me to sit beside her. She was telling me how she led a life full of compromises. She still had many things she wanted to do in her life but could not. She was depressed to the core that she lost the will to live or continue her life. She was not taken care of by her children properly. Her son and his wife were outside waiting for her to get immediately cured and discharged, as they could not meet the expenses. Her son asked me, "Is there any chance my mother will make it? For that, his wife is replying sarcastically that his mother will make all their savings dry before getting better and coming home. She passed away in a few days without being a burden to them.

Money is not everything. Success and fame is not everything in our life. We are all programmed so that we will be happy if we get all these things in our life. But sadly, that's not the reality. So then, why do some celebrities and successful people commit suicide? It all goes inside our minds. So what happens if we ignore to care for ourselves?

1. We always tend to miss something in our lives.

2. We tend to get ill often. Yes, it is true not only in the physical plane but also in the mental plane. You will frequently get infections like the common cold as your immunity levels get hit. In addition, you will develop conditions like anxiety around people or feeling isolated in a group.

3. Let us take that you are living your life per the wishes of your parents/wife/husband etc. You are a very good and obedient person to them. But inside your subconscious mind, you will feel you are under their control. This will strain your relationship, which is unhealthy as one day or the other you may burst out, and the very persons you were obeying all time may consider you disobedient, arrogant and selfish. 4. You become messy. Your personal life and professional life will turn sour. You cant put your 100% into either of them. 5. You tend to follow some gurus or watch inspirational videos on youtube and change your lifestyle as they say or how they ask you to live. But, ultimately, you will be the same person you were initially. How to self-care or how to come out of this situation? I don't want to tell you to exercise, do meditation, eat healthy etc. Those are the usual things they tend to say for all issues. Those things are needed, and I accept them wholeheartedly. Remember, the problem is not in the outside world or inside you. But what you make out of it. 1. The first thing you must do is accept yourself for who you are. Next, accept your limitations and shortcomings and look for how to improve genuinely. 2. Next step is to find out what makes you happy. We are all human beings. Something or the other in the world will make us happy. Try to find that. 3. Next is actively trying to do that activity in your life. Most often, those things are not a part of our daily routine. So take time, devote time for yourself once in a while. Just ensure your family understands and explain to them in a way they will appreciate rather than deal with the situation arrogantly. 4. Do not force anything on yourself in the name of self-care and make the situation worse. This happens when you suddenly prepare to hit the gym or meditate. 5. Do not expect instantaneous results. Just experiment. Take your time. Identify what makes you happy. There is a simple solution if you are still on the fence about trying to find what makes you happy. Just think about your childhood. Think of happy memories. Just close your eyes. Randomly choose one period from your teenage years in which you were so pleased you forgot about the outside world. Identify what activities you were doing. Just start doing those activities. 6. Avoid giving lame excuses that you are busy the whole day. If you think something worth spending time on, you will automatically devote some time to that activity. 7. This self-care can boost your productivity, your thoughts bring out more positivity, give you an adrenaline rush, and increase the serotonin levels in your body, which will, in turn, make you happy on the inside, which will improve your social relations, inspire you with new ideas in your work or whatever and heal you from the ground up. 8. If you start eating healthy food in this state, exercise in the morning and engage in healthy meditation, there is less chance of dropout. 9. Whatever you do daily, do not fix a goal. If you want to achieve greatness, do not expect anything. Just fix your wholehearted attention 101% on what you are doing in the present, try to do it as best as possible, and don't get attached to the outcome. 10. Each of us is different. What works for me is not going to work for you. So experiment with yourselves. Introspect yourself. Find your hidden talents. Find your inner strength. Most importantly, in the process of doing all these, please don't hurt the feelings of others. Make them understand. We have no right to be happy at the expense of hurting others' feelings. 11. Stop judging yourself and the people around you. If somebody wrongs you, just walk away. Don't vent your anger on others or self-inflict the anger on yourselves by abusing substances like alcohol. 12. Learn to forgive others and yourselves. We are all human beings. We all make mistakes. Just forgive, re-learn and programme not to repeat it again. 13. Stay away from social media as much as possible. Envy, jealousy, hatred and negative emotions spring from using social media if not used healthily.

I would like to wind up this blog by summarising it in a single paragraph, Introspect-find your inner source of happiness-dedicate time-energise-refuel-become strong-exercise-eat healthy-practice love, kindness and empathy-don't judge-forgive-no expectations-don't get attached with outcome-lead a healthy and happy life. Liver Happily Everafter.